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and write about ideas that can be utilized to prevent them. Breakdowns can include a range of
things such as: hostility towards co-workers and management, refusal to do given tasks, team
morale breakdown, and a general feeling of apathy at work. Why does this happen? The writer
experienced a workplace that was very generalized and used one method for a wide audience.
For example, a presentation on a new product is given during a staff meeting. Why are half of
the people looking at their phones and not paying attention and why are the other half really
excited? Why does a manager have a hard time understanding why his/her staff does not comply
with the rules he/she established? The writer has also been personally frustrated and de-
motivated by a “one approach fits all” management style. In the past, the writer had been asked
repeatedly to do a task that was supposed to help grow business and the writer never did the task.
When asked why, the writer did not know other than to simply say, “I do not work that way.” It
was not because the writer was trying to be defiant or break any rules but because that task
simply was not the correct fit in many dimensions including personality style, strengths, and
social style.
This paper will set out to address many questions. Who am I? What do people think of
me? What do I think of myself? What are my strengths and weaknesses? What am I good at?
Am I an introvert or an extrovert? How do I communicate with others? Why am I different
from others at work? All of these questions are related to the self. Knowing oneself can be
explored in many ways. This paper will focus from a work point of view but knowing oneself
can and will be applicable in other parts of life such as relationships, life balance, love, and many
others. The writer will explore personality and strengths combined with understanding
interactions with others and how these influence the self. Three assessments were chosen for this
research and they include: Myers-Briggs (MBTI), Strengths Finder, and Social Style.
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Self
This paper will breakdown the self into three components: self-esteem, self-concept, and
self-ideal. Self-esteem often has many questions surrounding the term such as: what is it, how
do I get it, where does it come from and what happens if it is low or how do I make it higher?
Ultimately self-esteem is a measure of how a person sees oneself and it is sometimes viewed as
“good or bad” and “high or low.” Research gives several varying definitions of self-esteem. In
his article “Optimal Self Esteem and Authenticity: Separating Fantasy from Reality” Kernis
(2003) describes self-esteem as “success dealing with life’s challenges, the operation of one’s
true self, and relationships in which people are valued for who they are” (p. 83). He also argues
that “all self-esteem is inherently contingent on meeting standards or on some form of social
acceptance or validation” (p. 83). Self-esteem is also defined on a broader scale as “generally
understood to be an individual’s overall feeling about self” or “a construct consisting of self-
related emotions tied to worthiness, value, likeableness and acceptance” (Searcy, 2006, p. 122).
Self-esteem is often defined or referred to as “high or “low,” but what does that mean and
how is it developed? A general definition is given by Malar, Krohmer, Hoyer and Nyffenegger
(2011) “People with high self-esteem like, value, and accept themselves, imperfections and all.
Low self-esteem represents an unfavorable definition of the self. However, each of us is strongly
driven to feel good about ourselves, and we try to maintain and enhance our self –esteem” (p.
37). Knox, Funk, Elliott, and Bush (1998) give a deeper insight into high self-esteem as it relates
to gender. “High self esteem in men was related to the capacity to see oneself as having
“uniquely superior abilities” whereas a high degree of interconnectedness with others appeared
to be related to higher levels of self-esteem in women” (p. 63). Cheng and Furnham (2003) look
at self-esteem from a behavior point of view. “Those low in self-esteem isolate themselves from
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others more often, tend to be more self-conscious and are also more likely to be depressed than
those with high self-esteem. High self-esteem has been reported to be one of the strongest
predictors of well-being” (p. 122-123).
Deep in the being of everyone is a desire to be loved, valued, and feel belonging.
“People want to believe they are worthy and valuable human beings, and this desire drives their
behavior” (Crocker, 2005, p. 200). “Self-esteem may be viewed as the outcome of occupying a
meaningful role relative to others” (Oberst & Stewart, 2003, p. 131). Since humans are social
creatures, self-esteem is developed in different ways but they all include interaction with others.
“Self-esteem can be developed in three ways: associations, activity, and aurally. Developed
through whom one associates with, what one does, and what one hears about oneself” (Searcy,
2006, p. 123).
In 2006 Searcy expanded upon these definitions: “associations” are defined as social
groups, family, peer groups, and friends, “ activity” self-esteem happens often through
achievement and just doing an activity can often be valuable and “aural” self-esteem develops
when someone hears something about oneself and hearing positive praise from significant others
is important in the development of self-esteem. (pp. 124-127)
The phrases “I am _____, I am not _____” often indicate thoughts of self-concept. A
brief definition of self-concept is “The sum total of all the beliefs about who “I am” (Carlson,
Watts, & Maniacci, 2005, p. 56). Self-esteem was explored previously and has many social
interactions that influence whether self-esteem goes up or down.
Self-concept is very internal to every individual. It is a thought process specific to what
we think we are. Malar et al. (2011) defined self-concept as the cognitive and affective
understanding of who and what we are. It is about who we think we are and are not and this can
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